Gratitude

It is so easy to buy into the drama that enters our lives, and so much harder to continue finding the place of peace.

Today, my first recourse is to remember the need for gratitude, for where I live which provides a safe refuge, for whom I work with that enables me to continue as I do, for my family and friends who support me which enables me to be who I want to be, and for others who enrich my life in as yet unquantifiable ways…

Centering

Sometimes I feel off-kilter. I know I’m not operating at my best. If someone close by were to nudge me, I might easily lose my balance.

If I focus my attention on my centre, which is the area surrounding my belly button, my mind becomes focused and I feel more balanced. The same nudge would have no effect.

Our navel is the centre of gravity of our body. Its position can indicate sports success or otherwise. Connecting with our navel can be an empowering exercise.

So now when my mind is racing in all directions, I imagine looking at my navel and feel an immediate release from distractions. Then I am ready to deal with the matter at hand.

Flexibility

My thinking has been too black and white lately. I’ll lock myself into a thought pattern, perhaps from previous times, and have difficulty in veering from that course. Sometimes that thought pattern hasn’t been the best way to go.

Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) encourages flexibility in interactions. If one way of being isn’t working, change it. If I have always done something in a certain way, then try doing it differently. Perhaps there is a better way.

Situations won't always pan out the way we expect. Accepting this, rather than trying to change it to match our model of the world, is the easier way to go.

Being flexible allows us to go with the flow in situations.  Trying different approaches could give us an equal or better result. Adding shades of grey and even colour lightens and enriches our mind. 

Influence

I get a little titchy when I feel like someone is trying to influence me. But then I realise that perhaps I have been trying to influence them in a different direction.

Watching or reading something might not be on my agenda at the time but thinking about mind stuff might not be on theirs if I try to broach it later .

So I decide whether or not to do what is presented to me mindful that they will do the same when I air my interest. Sometimes I see the value in their request and other times I decline.

After all, it is a free world with each of us free to indicate our personal preferences. And most times that's just what we need to do.

Putting the past behind

How do you put the past behind you? You do exactly that. 

All too often thoughts of the past crowd our mental space. We lose the present moment dwelling on past events. If we can move the past behind us then we’re free to engage with what is happening around us. 

Much has been said of the success enjoyed by athletes and sporting stars when they include visualisation in their training program. Since the mind does not differentiate between what is imagined and what is real, mentally seeing themselves succeeding in their chosen endeavour can translate into reality.

In the same way, mentally moving an image of a past event behind us can reduce emotional stress. When out of view it is harder for the mind to focus on it. The intensity is reduced. And the mind is clear.

Every action has a positive intent

Sometimes people do things that surprise or even annoy me. Was it really necessary to do what they did? What were they thinking?

After my mind settles down, I remember a presupposition taught to me some years ago in a Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) course. “Every action has a positive intent”. So I look for the positive intention behind the behaviour that surprised me. 

We all have different thoughts about what happens around us. Conflict occurs when two people have differing views on a particular thought or event. 

It is tempting to try to change the other person’s mindset so they will agree with us. But this doesn’t always work. An easier path is to look for the positive outcome in their action or thought which then provides a starting point for a constructive dialogue. Even approaching someone with a view to hearing their side of the story can go a long way in helping to ease a potentially difficult situation.

This doesn’t mean that we need to agree with the person. Instead, if we hear them out and let them know our thoughts about the issue then perhaps the best result would be to agree to disagree. But at least both sides have been heard and sometimes that is all that is needed.

Reincarnation

I was in a meditation group in the early 1990’s and one night read a statement in a magazine lying open on the table. It said that if there is an area that you don’t get right this lifetime, you’ll have to come back in another lifetime to try again. This was an interesting thought to me and has made me more conscious of aspects of my life that I’m not quite gelling in.

Reincarnation makes a lot of sense to me. I can’t say that I believe it, because there’s no way of proving that it is real. But whether or not it is the way things work, the concept can be used to explain so much about what happens to us. 

If we meet someone who feels familiar, perhaps there has been a past life connection. What might look like an unfair situation of someone receiving a lot of money leaving the other person penniless might be a karmic payback for a past reversal of fortunes. Phobias of heights, enclosed spaces and snakes could be the result of experiences in past lives.

The concepts of karma and reincarnation can help when we are overcome by strong emotions. If someone is no longer with us and guilt is playing on our mind, we can take comfort in the thought that there might be opportunities in future lifetimes to address any remaining issues.   

It doesn’t matter to me whether reincarnation is real or not. I look for karmic explanations of what is happening around me but generally don’t discuss these explanations with others. Karmic considerations contribute to a more peaceful mind which is what I’m looking for.